


Bagel Babies

by Feynite, SeleneLavellan



Series: Dirthalene [5]
Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Original Work
Genre: Accidental Baby Acquisition, Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic, F/M, Found Family, We may as well get married
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2018-12-20
Packaged: 2019-09-12 09:31:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 8,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16870465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Feynite/pseuds/Feynite, https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeleneLavellan/pseuds/SeleneLavellan
Summary: The Accidental Baby Acquisition Spinoff of the Dirthalene Bagel AU. Mostly a lot of teeth-rotting fluff drabbles about parenting.





	1. Chapter 1

Dirthamen receives a text at 2:48 am from Selene.

_> We need to talk._

His stomach clenches as he shoots up in bed and immediately gets dressed. He stares at his phone screen, trying to decipher the tone behind the writing. Perhaps it is not as dire to their relationship as those words are said to be. She could be hurt, or in trouble, and need his help. She could have something on her mind that she is excited about and wishes to discuss with him happily, even.

His eyes shift to the time on the top of his screen

2:53 am.

This is unlikely to be a positive conversation.

He gets into his car and drives to her apartment.

 

He arrives at 3:37am, and stands in front of her door, uncertainty preventing him from knocking. He takes out his phone, and calls her instead. He can hear her phone ring through the too-thin walls, and his stomach drops when it shoots to voicemail on his end.

He hangs up, and tries to figure out what he had done that could have led her to the decision to end things. There have not been any arguments lately, and she had not expressed any displeasure the previous night when they had broken in his new couch.

His phone vibrates.

_> Can you come over? I know it’s late, I’m sorry._

 

He knocks.

She opens the door, and places one finger to her lips while gesturing for him to come inside.

 

Her air mattress is set up on the floor of her living room, and her furniture has been pushed against the walls of her apartment and in front of her kitchen, creating a blockade of sorts.

There is a blanket over the mattress, covering two small forms with pointed ears.

He is no longer sure what could be happening, as Selene takes him into her bedroom and sits him on the edge of her mattress, the door still slightly ajar in case of any noises coming from the living room.

 

“So…we never, really, had this discussion. I didn’t think anything of it before, but now it seems like a pretty important question to ask you, and I know this is strange, but I didn’t know who else I could ask for help and-”

 

he takes her hand and places a soft kiss on the top of it in an effort to calm her down without interrupting her. She sighs when he does, and takes a deep breath before continuing.

 

“How do you feel about kids?”

 

Dirthamen considers his answer carefully, his eyes darting to the slightly open door and the tension in Selene’s shoulders, the way her free hand is bunching in her shirt. She is afraid he will leave her.  
  


“Are they yours?” he already knows the answer, but is attempting to diffuse the tense atmosphere.

It works, as Selene laughs “No, I didn’t somehow hide a pregnancy from you. I wouldn’t. I just…” she sighs “Someone left them in front of the school, after hours. I was working late, and almost tripped over them. The orphanage is already full, and there wasn’t anyone else around and it’s not like I could just leave them there to starve, right?”

“Are you planning on sending them to your clan?”

Selene shifts on her feet, biting down on her lower lip.

“No. I don’t…no. I was thinking of keeping them, if I could.”

“You wish to adopt two elven babies someone left in the street?”

 

She frowns at his wording, but he meant no offense. It is a strange topic to be discussing, and he is still tired.

“Essentially, yes. My finances are in order, and I have an extra room.”

“Your things are stored in there.”

“Then I can sell the things I don’t absolutely need and use it to take care of them.”

He considers.

“You are absolute in your decision then?”

 

She nods without hesitation. “Yes, I am.”

He nods back “Then I will assist you. If you would like.”

 

Her eyebrows shoot up “Dirthamen, you don’t have to do this. I wasn’t trying to like, trap you or anything.”

“I have considered children in the past. My biggest concern with them was my family, and the high probability of any children I sired being primed as an heir.” he nods towards the door “I believe this may actually be the perfect solution.”

 

She is silent and still for a minute.

Then she steps towards him and gives him a crushing kiss, pushing him back down on the bed.

It feels like a desperate sort of thanks, but he returns it happily, his arms wrapping around her to pull her closer still.

 

When they break for air, he stares up at the ceiling and notices the black mold growing in from the corner.

“You can not raise them here. I will find a suitable place for us.”

“What?”

He points to the ceiling “There are several health hazards, especially for ones so young as them in a building this old. You should not have been here as long as you have been either, truthfully. A newer, larger place will solve that.”

“Wait, are you asking me to move in with you?”

 

He considers for a moment “Yes. But my own apartment would also be unsuitable for children. We will look for a new home in the morning, if you do not mind. I will get the appropriate paperwork moving as well.” he is already typing out an email on his phone to send to the family realtor- without details, he does not need others knowing what is happening. Yet.

He considers what issues may arise and turns to her

“We may need to marry as well.”

Selene nearly chokes on the air she was breathing.

“Ok, wait, pause.”

“It will make the process of adoption much smoother if the adoptive parents are already legally wed.”

“We are not even living together yet, Dirthamen!”

He hums thoughtfully “I suppose that is fair. I will work around it then, if you would prefer.”

She lets out a small breath of relief. It makes her look very tired, and he is reminded of the late hour.

“We should get some rest.” he declares

She looks worriedly over her shoulder at the door and he places a finger carefully under her chin. “We can sleep in the living room if you would prefer. Just this once.”

She smiles and places a gentle kiss to the palm of his hand.

“Thank you.”

 

They strip the sheets from her bed and move the pillows to make a space on the floor near to the air mattress. It is not very comfortable, but they are both tired enough that it barely matters.

When Dirthamen wakes to Selene in his arms and the two children rolling on the mattress in front of him, something in his chest settles warmly, and he is confident in his choices.


	2. Grocery Shopping

“What do you mean ‘babies cant eat that’ of course they can.” Selene argues.

“No, they run the risk of choking.” Dirthamen replies coolly

“They are babies, they run that risk on their own drool!”

“Yes. We will need to get burping cloths as well.”

Selene frowns and maintains eye contact with Dirthamen while tossing the seedless grapes into the cart defiantly.

Dirthamen lets out a sigh and continues going through the checklist.

 

Babies need an extraordinary amount of items, apparently. There are several brands of diapers being rush delivered to their new apartment, as well as two cribs, mattresses, a slew of clothing, blankets, and plush toys, several types of bottles and bath items, and someone is professionally baby proofing the apartment while they are out purchasing food together. As a family. It is a strange sensation.

 

Dirthamen is still worried he will forget something, despite Selene’s assurances that they already have more than what could actually be required. They have both taken the rest of the week off from work, although he will still be overseeing most of his responsibilities from his laptop once they are settled, and Selene plans on making lesson plans to be delivered to the school for the substitute.

 

Currently she is making strange faces at the twins while they try to grab at her loose hair. She shakes her head quickly, and they both break out into giggles. He cannot seem to stop staring, and he feels a pleasant warmth spread through his chest.

Selene catches him staring and grins broadly at him, pushing the cart quickly to move next to him.

“What’s left?”

“Formula, I believe.”

“Well, that shouldn’t be too hard.”

 

Selene was wrong.

Selene was so, _so_  wrong.

 

The wall of cans looms over them, each with some sort of drawer dispenser underneath to remove them, but no way to put them back.

There are  _so many_  different kinds of formulas; ready made or powder, organic, soy-based, iron, fortified, probiotic, prebiotic, and Selene does not know what to do or how to choose or if choosing the wrong one will seriously harm the children, or if they will have different preferences and so when a woman behind them lets out a 'tsk’ noise and mutters under her breath about lazy mothers not wanting to breastfeed, Dirthamen has to physically ground her to keep her from taking out her frustration on the stranger. He places a gentle kiss on her cheek, and the tension runs out of her.

 

“I have no idea what I’m doing,” she sighs.

 

Dirthamen considers the dilemma “We will pick up a days supply of ready made then, the basic type, and see how they handle it. They have an appointment with a pediatrician tomorrow morning, and I’m sure they will have suggestions and ample information to help us make a decision. If you are still unsure or uncomfortable, we will look into getting a nutritionist for them. It may not be a bad idea either way, given that we do not know their genetic history.”

 

Selene smiles at him, and places a soft kiss to his lips “I love you.”

Despite their extended time together, his stomach still somersaults each time she says those words “I love you too,” he promises.

 

One of the twins makes a gurgling sound, and they turn to look at them in unison. Selene places a kiss to each of their foreheads, holding Dirthamens hand in her own “And we love you both as well.”


	3. Chapter 3

Sleep deprivation is not a new concept for Selene. She’s had a Desire demon nipping at her heels for almost 20 years, she knows how to cheat sleep. 

It still works for a little while, after the twins arrive. According to the pediatrician, they were only a few weeks old when Selene found them, so they needed to spend more time asleep than awake, and there’s that whole ‘sleep when the babies sleep’ rule of thumb.

It would be a wonderful rule, if only the rest of the world stopped turning when the babies slept. But Selene has a job, and responsibilities she still has to deal with. She calls in all of her vacation time, which in a non-unionized low budget school in the middle of the year turns out to be about a week and a half. She used up her half the when the babies showed up, so Selene has a week.

 

Ok. She’ll make it work.

 

She makes up a weeks worth of lesson plans and drops them off at the school while Dirthamen is working, babies in tow in their double stroller. She stops off at the garden plot Dirthamen got for her and does a bit of maintenance there, (not much is needed with the kids from class monitoring their own things) a few trimmings and a general watering. She plucks a few small flowers for the twins.

 

She has to stop them from immediately eating them.

Voluntarily sticking her finger into a babies mouth will never not be weird.

 

She takes them home after that, and the twins sleep for most of the trip.

Which of course means they’re both wide awake as soon as she gets them through the door.

 

Once they’re both comfortably laid out on their playmat, Selene moves into the kitchen to make a pair of bottles, still peeking out over the breakfast bar to ensure neither of them run off somehow. She carefully picks one of them up and moves him back to the mat after he successfully rolls over a few times, and lays down next to them.

 

They still really need names.

 

Selene isn’t sure what’s going to happen when her vacation time runs out and they’ll need to be looked after during the day. Dirthamen has reservations about a nanny, and Selene is not thrilled with throwing them into a daycare for 8 hours a day at this young an age.

 

They both have family members who could theoretically watch them, but that almost sounds worse.

Well, except for…hm.

There’s no major holidays or events coming up with the clan, she thinks. He could probably make it over to help out, at least for a few more weeks.

She’s still mulling it over when Dirthamen walks in the door.

She stands and greets him with a kiss while he removes his tie (it only took the babies pulling on it hard enough to choke him once to learn that lesson) and fills him in on the events of the day.

“Did you sleep at all?” he asks

“No, I wasn’t tired,” she lies.

He levels a stare at her, but doesn’t push the issue.

 

After dinner, while the babies are passed out in their room from their post-dinner food coma, Selene drags Dirthamen into their large-enough-to-share shower (definitely one of her favorite features of the new place) and although she had a point to make and things she wanted to talk to him about, the situation becomes…distracting before too long.

 

She remembers after, when they are drying off “Dirthamen?”

 

“Hm?” he asks, still a bit hazy from the events.

 

“How would you feel about having a family member watch the twins once I go back to work?”

 

He frowns, and stands up straight from where he had been bent over the sink toweling off his hair.

“I do not think that would be wise.”

 

“Well, what if they weren’t one of  _your_  family members?” she asks, slowly.

 

He raises an eyebrow at her “I thought you said you were not interested in having them raised by your clan. And you’ve always immediately changed the subject when I inquire about your parents, so I assumed there was a strain somewhere in your relationship with them.”

 

“Well you’re not wrong. I wasn’t thinking about my parents though. I have this cousin, Alaris, and he might be able to watch them.”

 

Dirthamen is getting that little crinkle between his eyebrows that means he’s going through a list of potential consequential fallouts of a decision, so Selene waits patiently for it to smooth out.

 

“Perhaps.” he finally settles on. And that’s the last they speak of it that night.

 

They crawl into bed together, Selene wrapped around Dirthamen and she falls quickly into the fade.

 

Des is waiting for her. Because of course he is.

He’s laid out on the couch in a rendition of their new home, but with sharper edges and less saturated colors.

 

“Well well well, Sulvuna. Tell me, how are things?” he grins, smile full of teeth.

 

“They’re fine, Des.” she answers flatly, moving to where the window should be and begins her usual counting, her back to him.

 

“Better than 'fine’ from what I’ve heard. You and loverboy have children now? You forgot the fun bit of that process you know.”

 

“Oh, haha. Clever, you made a sex joke. Learn a new trick, Des.”

 

He winds his arms around her waist, resting his head on her shoulder and she rolls her eyes, going back to focusing on her numbers

“Hm, a new trick, a new trick. Alright, I’ve got a few for you. The first is this; both of your little tykes are going to be mages.”

  
Selene stiffens and turns to face him “Wait, really?”

 

“Mm-hm,” Des replies, his hands attempting to drift underneath the layers of her armor before she slaps them away.

 

“You can’t know that.”

 

“Do you know that I can’t?”

 

Selene narrows her eyes “You have to be lying. They’re too young for magic to show.”

 

“Maybe to you, but babies  _do_  dream you know,” he grins, but it’s all teeth. “If you’re not interested in me sharing your body, there are two waiting right under your nose now. I’ll even give you the same deal as I would if you gave me your own.”

 

“I would sooner walk into a chantry and volunteer for the rite of tranquility than allow you near either of them,” she snarls.

 

Des lets go of her and holds his hands up in mock surrender “Alright, alright, you don’t have to decide right now. I think you’re about to be needed elsewhere, anyways.”

 

His words fade out as Selene is awoken by the sounds of the twins crying through the baby monitor, Dirthamen attempting to roll out of her grip. “No, you stay here and go back to sleep,” she tells him with a yawn “You have work in a few hours. I’ll take care of them.”

 

“Selene, you have gone each night so far. You will need a full nights sleep at some point,” he lectures, but she waves him off and is already heading out the door, ignoring the small sigh and thump of him falling back into bed.

 

After an hour or so of changing, feeding, burping, and lullabies, the two boys are put back in their respective cribs. Selene looks at the time, and decides to brew some coffee and read on the couch rather than head back to bed; she’s in no rush to see Des again.

 

She’s back in front of him the following night anyways, after another long day of avoiding real rest and Dirthamens disapproving stares.

 

Des is waiting in their bed this time, gesturing openly for her. She scoffs and sits cross legged on the other side of the room to begin counting.

 

“You still interested in new tricks?” he asks, and she can hear the bed creaking as he crawls towards her.

 

“No,” she answers, keeping her eyes closed.

 

“Are you sure? This one is quite good, if you ask me.”

 

“Good thing I didn’t ask then,” she responds.

 

“Oh, come now. I went to all this trouble to track him down and you won’t even let me show you…” he trails off.

 

Selene cracks an eye open “…Track who down?”

 

Des props his chin up on his hands, feet dangling in the air like a stereotypical teenage girl with some particularly juicy gossip. “Oh, you know. Grandpa. Pop-pop?”

 

Selene raises an eyebrow at him, radiating disapproval. “You can speak with the dead now? I suppose that  _is_  a new trick.”

 

Des laughs, and it feels like it resonates through her bones “No, no. Not  _yours_.  **Theirs**. You know, Elgar'nan?”

 

Her stomach drops as Des continues on.

 

“Do you have any idea how badly he wants grandchildren? It’s precious, really. All of these awful, terrible desires that twist and ruin so many lives, and then there’s just this one little pearl of goodness floating around in there, a love for  _children_. Imagine my surprise when I found out you hadn’t even told him yet.”

 

“Des, tell me you didn’t-”

 

“No, no, don’t worry Sulvuna, I didn’t give away the game. I could though. I can’t imagine he’d be very happy to find out his son had been hiding this from him. The betrayal, the scandal, the  _fallout_. I bet we could feed on that for months, if not years.”

 

She grimaces “So you’re, what, blackmailing me?”

 

He feigns hurt, one of his hands moving to his chest before trailing down in a bit of a show “Why, I would never. I care for you, Sulvuna,  _deeply._  I would never want to hurt you like that.”

 

“You’re a dirty liar, Des.”

 

“No, no, just dirty,” he purrs, reappearing next to her with a finger under her chin.

 

“What do you want then?”

 

He tuts, grabbing her face more fully.

“Sulvuna, when will you learn? This has never been about what  _I_ want.”

 

She jolts awake, the twins cries pouring out of the baby monitor again like clockwork. Dirthamen is attempting to slip into a shirt while half asleep and Selene pulls him gently back into bed, placing a soft kiss on his lips and a gentle pat on his chest while she leaves to take care of their children.

 

This may be trickier than she had thought.


	4. Chapter 4

Dirthamen’s toes are very cold.

It is not an unusual occurrence, Selene has complained on more than one occasion, but he can actually feel it now.

He glances down, and sees one of the twins casting a thin sheen of frost over his foot, and glancing up at him with a sheepish grin.

“Whoops,” he says. “I didn’ think that would actually work.”

 

Interesting. He was not aware they  _had_  magical abilities yet. They are barely in school.

 

Dirthamen casts a small warming spell to melt away the frost and looks at Felasel “Where did you learn such a thing?”

 

“Uhhhh…internet.”

 

Dirthamen raises an eyebrow skeptically.

 

“…Darevas and I may have stumbled over one of mama’s old notebooks. But they never worked before! I wasn’t tryin’ to hurt you or nothin’… m'sorry.”

 

Dirthamen reaches down and pulls his son up into his lap. “I forgive you. You must be careful with magic though, it can hurt people without trying. Do you understand?”

 

Felasel nods “I’ll do better papa.”

 

Dirthamen gives his son a tight hug and a soft kiss on the forehead “Is your brother also practicing with you?”

 

“Yes, papa.”

 

“I will discuss a proper tutor for this with your mother when she gets home then. Would you like something to eat in the meantime?”

 

“Cookies!”

 

Dirthamen contemplates the matter for a moment “Fair enough, but it has to be the oatmeal raisin.”

 

Felasel makes a face “No, nevermind I’m not hungry.”

 

Dirthamen chuckles, and turns as he hears the doorknob turning, Felasel running out of his grasp “They’re home!”

 

Selene walks through the door with her arms full of  groceries, Darevas at her side and carrying a small bag with snacks in it.

 

“We’re home! Did you have fun with your father while we were gone?”

 

“Uh-huh,” Felasel answers, already distracted looking through the items Darevas is carrying.

 

Selene rolls her eyes good humoredly and glances at Dirthamen “They grow up so fast. Snacks today, cell phones tomorrow. Seems like only yesterday they were begging to sleep in our bed instead of their own.”

 

“Nuh-uh, that was last week!”

 

“Oh of course, my mistake da'len,” she laughs.

 

Dirthamen takes one of the bags from her and she silently thanks him with a kiss on his cheek.

“May I help you put these away?” he says, glancing between the twins and her pointedly.

 

Selene picks up on the cue and follows him into the kitchen.

“Is everything alright?”

 

“I believe so. I thought you should know that Felasel used magic while you were gone though. He said Darevas is able to as well.”

 

She drops the bag of apples she was emptying onto the floor, her face paling. “Wait, really? But-they’re so young, Dirthamen. Are you sure?”

 

“I believe my frozen toes were a solid indicator, yes.”

 

Her balance starts to fail her, and she leans back against the counter, one hand over her mouth “Wh-what do we do?”

 

“I was thinking of getting them a tutor for the skill. I found it very helpful when I began using magic myself,” he places a steadying hand carefully on her shoulder “Are you alright?”

 

Selene nods slowly, wordlessly, before shaking her head and giving him a weak smile “Yes. Yes, I’m fine, sorry. This is great, of course it is. A tutor sounds like a great idea. Do you have one in mind?”

 

Dirthamen informs her that he will look into who would be available, but she still seems a bit shaken.

 

He decides they will need to discuss it further after the twins have gone to bed, and helps her finish putting away the groceries.


	5. D*sney Trip

“No, absolutely not.” Selene bounces one of the twins gently in an effort to assist in burping while Dirthamen is keeping an eye during the other ones ‘tummy time’.

 

“The twins should meet their extended family at some point, and the twins are at a good age for travel.”

 

“Then let them travel somewhere else. You’re rich, don’t you have a cabin or vista somewhere we could visit instead?”

 

“Yes, but Andruil and Ghilain'nain are residing there currently.”

 

“So that’s out,” Selene sighs “We don’t  _have_  to go anywhere for the summer. You’ve missed a lot of work already.”

 

Dirthamen tilts his head “You’re really so desperate to avoid your clan that you would encourage me to work  _more_?”

 

“Desperate is a strong word…” she side steps, placing the baby down next to their brother on the mat.

“I would just be more comfortable if we waited a few more years, or decades, before we took them to the Free Marches.”

 

Dirthamen shakes a small jingling toy, and they both watch in amusement while the babies try to roll their way over to it.

 

“Very well. Where would you like to go then?”

 

Selene hums thoughtfully “If we could go anywhere, you mean?”

  
Dirthamen nods “Within reason, yes.”

 

“Well, you can’t go wrong with the classics…”

—

You can indeed go wrong with the classics.

 

Summer at Disney World is  _HOT._

 

A large chunk of their first day is spent trying to keep the twins inside the air conditioning so that they don’t bake in the sun. Another chunk is spent trying to find rides that the four of them can actually enjoy at the twins age.

  
They settle for the Carousel, which is actually rather wonderful. They have to sit in the non-moving decorative bench, but the twins gaggle excitedly just watching the other horses moving and spinning around with them which makes it a resounding success. They go on it 5 times.

 

Selene is dead set on getting a family photo with at least one of the characters before the end of the trip. Dirthamen acquiesces, and they manage to get one of Felasel screaming his head off at Belle, another of Darevas vomiting next to Donald, and one with the twins asleep and being held with Chip and Dale.

 

She is glowing when they finally make it make to their hotel room, which makes any other disasters well worth the hassle, Dirthamen thinks.

 

The twins pass right out after their bath and their parents eagerly place them into the suites cribs for the night and slump down onto the couch.

 

“This is not quite what the brochure claimed. I apologize,” Dirthamen murmurs into the top of Selenes head.

 

She laughs and turns in his arms to face him “I thought it was great. The heat was bad, but there’s nothing you or I could do about that. Besides, its only the first day. The first day is always the worst.”

 

Dirthamen lets out a quiet 'hm’ in response, leaning his head back and closing his eyes.

 

“Are you alright?” Selene inquires softly

 

“It was much more crowded than I expected. I will be fine.”

 

Selene nods, then stands and takes his hand in hers “Come on,”

 

Dirthamen makes a displeased grunting noise in response.

 

“You paid for a suite and you’re going to spend the night on the couch? That doesn’t sound like you.”

 

“I have been on my feet all day. I am coated in sweat and dirt and am not entirely sure that all of it is mine. I assure you, the couch is not so bad.”

 

Selene hums and lets her hand drift slowly up his stomach and underneath his shirt, maintaining eye contact.

 

“I packed a surprise as a thank you, you know. But it’s for clean Dirthamen, not sweaty Dirthamen. You’re salty enough on your own, I think” she teases.

 

Dirthamen carries her all the way to the shower.

 

The hotel is his personal favorite part of the trip.


	6. Chapter 6

Dirthamen blinks at Selenes crazed grin when he arrives home from work.

Both of the twins are giggling in their walkers as well, tiny fluffy booties on each of them, Selene wearing her own thigh high fuzzy striped socks.

  
She tosses a dark purple pair at him

“Put those on.”

 

He blinks again, but complies, taking off his shoes and previously worn socks in the doorway “For what purpose?”

 

“Baby racing.”

 

He pauses

“Pardon?”

 

Selenes grin just gets larger and he thinks that she is perhaps one of those people who  _need_  to work in order to avoid a mental breakdown before she answers.

 

“Baby racing. I just waxed, the walker wheels are clean, and the twins are wearing fluffy socks. You have to wear them too, or its not fair.”

 

Dirthamen nods hesitatingly “What are the rules of…‘baby racing’?”

 

“You’ve got to keep a hold of the walker at all times, you have to cross the room in a mostly straight line, and no purposeful bumping into your opponents. Do you want Felasel the Fierce or Darevas the Daring?”

 

“You gave our children racing names?”

 

“It’s part of the fun!” She insists.

 

Dirthamen chuckles, but takes a hold of Felasels walker. “I’m not sure why the socks matter, admittedly,”

 

Selene grins broadly at him “Oh, you will. Make sure you keep a hold of that walker. Ready, set,  _GO_!”

She yells, and Darevas giggles happily as Selene darts forward quickly, sliding across the floor.

  
Dirthamen supposes it does not seem so difficult, but Felasel looks up at him worriedly anyways. He nods in what is supposed to be a reassuring manner and pushes forward himself.

He promptly realizes why the socks matter as he slides himself directly into the walker.

Felasel pats his head gently while Selene cheers from the other side of the apartment, spinning Darevas around in the air.

 

Oh. So _that_  is the game, he thinks as he sits back up. “Rematch?”

 

Selene grins at him and places Darevas back in his seat, pushing him carefully back to the ‘starting line’ “Sure.”

 

Dirthamen is prepared this time, as he shoots out with a single powerful thrust, pushing a screaming Felasel who simply pulls his own legs up, and skirts to a smooth stop just before they hit the wall.

 

Selene arrives seconds after, and even Darevas looks impressed as they stare at Dirthamen. “Where did you learn to do that?” Selene asks with no small amount of awe.

 

Dirthamen shrugs “Around.”

 

Selene just shakes her head “Best two out of three?”

 

Dirthamen nods.

 

They do not stop at three, and before too long, they are all skidding along the floor in their socks, laughing and screaming. Sometimes the babies are in their walkers, sometimes they are being held, and one time Darevas even manages to get Dirthamen to put him up on his shoulders and claps giddily the whole way across.

 

No one remembers to keep score, and the floor is a mess again by the time they are finished.


	7. Chapter 7

There is rain pouring down on the roof of their new home. The twins are asleep in their room while the Child Services agent carries on their inspection and questionnaire.

 

They are both trying very hard to appear calm, but as she rubs her thumb back and forth over his hand, his own grip only becomes tighter with each mark the agent writes on their clipboard.

Dirthamen is not willing to give up the twins, regardless of this strangers judgment, and is already making a mental list of other areas they could relocate to if denied.

 

Finally, the agent sits on one of their chairs and crosses one leg over the other.

“Alright then, you two. Your home is lovely, and it seems as though the necessary precautions for child rearing have been taken in its construction,”

 

Selene brightens considerably

 

“However,” they continue, and she sinks once more, her thumb resuming its previous pattern “There is still the matter of your relationship to each other.”

 

Dirthamen frowns “Adoption is legal to unwed couples,” he states.

 

“That have been co-habitating for five years or more, yes. Because they have a common law marriage. According to our records, the two of you moved in together just this month, however, and so I can not recommend you for co-parenting. If either of you would like to reapply individually, perhaps even take one child for each of you-”

 

“That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard,” Selene interrupts. “We haven’t been living together long enough so now we have to choose to potentially separate the children, so that in another few years we can each re-adopt the other anyways? No, absolutely not, that is  _absurd_. How long would we need to be married before we could adopt?”

 

“Technically, you could then adopt as soon as the marriage was legalized.” the agent responds slowly.

 

Selene turns to Dirthamen “How quickly could you acquire a marriage license?”

He blinks. Blinks again.

 

“Is this a proposal?”

 

She pauses, mentally replaying the conversation in her head before speaking “I suppose it is, yes. I’m sorry it’s not,” she releases his hand and gestures vaguely “more. But you know we’re suppose to be together. I knew it the first time I saw you, and you know it, too. I know you do. So if doing this now will make our lives better, and will make the twins lives better, then let’s just…let’s do it. Let’s get married.”

 

He considers the offer carefully; it is not as though he had not put marriage on the table the first night she had mentioned them, he supposes. It is not even as though he was not planning on eventually taking that step with her one day already. He just supposes he thought he would be the one to ask her, and that it would, indeed, be somehow  _more_. He knows there is normally a large romantic gesture made at this point, some well-rehearsed speech and a large fitted ring. Even Andruil had spent several weeks preparing her proposal to her wife, and Sylaise had in fact designed hers  _for_ June and given him particular spots where he was allowed a modicum of flexibility to fit in his own ideas.

He has no ring, no speech prepared, no reservations or grand date planned. Just their home, and the twins, and the opportunity to spend the rest of his life with Selene.

It is more than enough.

 

“I will make the arrangements. We can have a courthouse ceremony this week, if that will be adequate.”

 

Selene offers him a smile and nods, turning resolutely back to the agent “Can you come back in a week?”

 

They tap their pen three times against their clipboard and let out a small sigh, removing and crumpling up the paper they had been filling out “Yes. You were not home when I arrived, and we rescheduled. I will see you both a week from today, at the same time.”

 

“Thank you,” they both say, sincerely as they escort the Agent out of their home.

 

Selene closes the door gently behind them, and turns to Dirthamen.

“We’re really getting married?” she asks, a smile creeping slowly across her face.

“Yes. I believe we are.” he answers, his own smile growing to match hers before she pulls him in for a passionate kiss, and they pass the rest of the afternoon tumbling in each others arms.


	8. Baking Cookies

“If you keep eating the chocolate chips in the bag, we won’t have anything to add to the cookies,” Selene frowns, staring at Darevas and Felasel perched on the counter. Each of them is holding a now open bag of chocolate chips, their little fingers sticky with half-melted chips held between their fingers for too long.

  
“We should get three bags next time, instead” Darevas says decisively.

 

Selene sighs and shakes her head, taking the bags away from the twins and handing them each a wet wipe “No, you two need to learn a little patience.”

 

“We  _were_  waiting patiently for the butter to soften,” Felasel points out “We just got hungry.”

 

Selene is about to lecture them about appropriate snacking when the door clicks shut in the living room. Darevas jumps off of the counter while Felasel holds his arms out for Selene to carefully pull him down and they are both off like a shot to greet Dirthamen as he takes off his shoes by the door.

 

Selene crosses her arms and leans against the kitchen doorframe with a smirk while Dirthamen struggles to stand up, one twin on his back and the other dangling off of an arm.

 

He manages eventually, and strides towards Selene to greet her with a kiss. She takes a giggling Darevas off of Dirthamens arm after, perching him on her hip and strolling back into the kitchen.

 

“How was work?” she asks as she places Darevas back on the counter, out of reach of the chocolate chips.

 

Dirthamen shrugs and plops Felasel on the counter next to his brother and gives each of them a kiss on their foreheads “Manageable. You are…baking?” he asks nervously.

 

Selene frowns at his tone from where she had been searching the drawers “Yes. We all are, in fact.”

 

“Ah,”

 

Selene digs through the drawer a bit more until she has all of her measuring spoons, mixer accessories, and an appropriate number of bowls, then stands and turns around.

 

Dirthamen is snacking on one of the bags of chocolate chips, and has apparently given the other back to the twins to split.

 

“What are you doing?” She asks with not a small hint of betrayal in her voice.

 

Dirthamen looks down at the twins who both shake their head in a  clear ‘No, we are not covering for you’ sort of way before turning back to Selene.

He holds the bag out for her in offering “Would you like one while they are still edible?”

 

She huffs slightly “My baking is not  _that_  bad. I thought you liked when I cook.”

 

“I do. Your meals are quite excellent. For some reason, however, that talent has never crossed over into your baking skills. It is a mystery why, but alas, here we are.”

 

“You ate the brownies we made last month.”

 

“And we were all sick the following day.”

 

Selene sighs and after a minute begins to put away all of the tools she had pulled out “Fine. No cookies then.”

 

Dirthamen comes up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and spins her around to face him. She blinks at him in surprise, and he places a kiss to her lips with a smile.

 

“Ugh, gross. Contamination,” Felasel mumbles from a mouth full of chocolate.

 

Dirthamen laughs, and Selene relaxes and mutters a quiet “I love you,” under her breath. His arms tighten around her briefly and he responds in kind with an “I love you too,” mumbled against her cheek.

 

The twins have progressed to faking retching noises from the counter.


	9. Chapter 9

Dirthamen is very nervous when he sees Falon'dins car parked in the driveway of his new home.

Selene is home. With the children.

 

He runs to the front door, and his nerves do not settle when he discovers it is unlocked.

 

He races towards the sound of Lavellan’s coos, not bothering to remove his shoes and is, surprisingly, relieved at what he finds.

 

Their coffee table seems to be missing, but his brother is unconscious on the couch, while Selene rocks a giggling Lavellan in her arms from the kitchen.

 

“Where are the twins?” he asks. Selene doesn’t bother looking away from making faces at the baby in her arms as she answers “I sent them to play in the backyard when I saw him pull in to the driveway.”

 

Dirthamen moves to the back door, and feels a rush of relief at seeing Darevas and Felasel kicking a soccer ball between each other. He makes his way back to the kitchen and takes their daughter from Selene, giving each of them a kiss on the cheek. “What happened?”

 

Selene sighs, opens the fridge and begins to pour herself a glass of orange juice “The usual. He came over looking for money and you, and started yelling slurs when I wouldn’t give him either.”

 

Dirthamen frowns “You should have told him I was in a meeting.”

 

Selene scoffs “I am not letting him use you as a punching bag anymore. It’s not healthy, for either of you. Anyways, I told him not to use that sort of language in front of the baby-”

 

“You should not permit him to use them on you at all-”

 

“- _And when he refused_ ,” she continues “I placed Lavellan in her bedroom playpen with one of her movies on, came back out, and tried to speak with him.”

 

“I do not suppose that went over well,” Dirthamen contemplates as Lavellan gums on one of his fingers.

 

“Better than the last attempt, anyways,” she shrugs. “But no, it didn’t settle him down quite enough. He took a swing at me and fell over.  A few times. He’s surprisingly clumsy, you know.” Selene lies.

 

Dirthamen levels a stare at her “What actually happened?” he asks, placing his hands over Lavellans ears. Selene would swear the baby gives off a small huff.

 

Selene hesitates, but ultimately relents “He tried to stab me through with one of the kitchen knives, I whited out, and we probably need a new coffee table.”

 

“Are you alright?”

 

Selene nods “It was just a nick. I managed to clean up the glass, ran a vacuum, and changed Lavellan. I tried to make it look like he was just asleep on the couch, in case one of the twins came in for a drink.”

 

Dirthamen nods slowly, and eyes the slice on the side of Selenes shirt. The edges are tinted red, and it makes something in him feel cold.

“You should go change. I will keep an eye on things.”

 

Selene tries to argue, but seems to pick up quickly on the change in his demeanor. Lavellan pats his chest gently, pulling him out of his head when he thinks on it for too long, and he gives her a smalll smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

 

“Don’t worry. I won’t let him hurt any of you again. I swear it.”


	10. Chapter 10

Darevas’ papa is the pushover, a lot of the time.

Not that Mama is  _hard_ to win over or anything, but she’s usually a little bit more resistant to things like extra cookies before dinner, or staying up a few minutes past bedtime to finish watching a television show, or getting new toys, or things like that. Mama’s not immune to Puppy Eyes, but Papa is, in Darevas’ opinion, usually the bigger sucker.

That’s why, when him and Felasel get caught with the bag of candy that’s supposed to be for trick-or-treaters, he’s kind of glad, at first, that it’s Papa who opened the door.

“Boys,” Papa says, looking at the bag, and the empty wrappers, and at their slightly sticky fingers. “You know that candy is not for you.”

He moves into the room, and takes the bag. Darevas wipes at his mouth, and glances at his brother.

“It was Felasel’s idea,” he says. Felasel’s face falls, but he doesn’t say different as he looks down at the carpet.

Papa glances between them, and frowns.

“Was it your idea, Felasel?” he asks, in his careful voice, that means he’s thinking about something.

Felasel scuffs a hand over his knee, wiping his fingers on the denim of his pants. He looks at Darevas, who makes a ‘zip it’ gesture, but too slow; Papa turns back towards him in time to see, and when he does, he goes all rigid and his eyebrows narrow and Darevas’ stomach drops because Papa…

…Papa looks  _mad._

Really,  _really_  mad.

Darevas doesn’t know what to do, what to say, how to get out of trouble as Papa kneels down in front of him.

“Felasel,” he says, quietly. “Go put the candy back, and tell Mama what you did. Tell her I said you get no desert, because otherwise you will have had too much sugar. I will ask her later, to make sure you did.”

Felasel hesitates, a second. 

“What about Darevas?” he asks.

“Darevas is in more trouble than you,” Papa says, and Darevas’ stomach sinks as his brother looks at him awkwardly for a moment, and then picks up the candy bag and carries it out into the living room. Papa shuts the door behind him, and Darevas…

Darevas bursts into tears.

“I’m sorry,” he says. “I’m sorry, Papa. Please don’t be mad.”

Papa’s expression shifts, and Darevas doesn’t know why he is so scared, but he  _is._  He didn’t think taking the candies would be  _that_  bad. He didn’t think they’d get in real serious trouble for it. It shouldn’t be enough to make Papa  _angry,_  when Papa hardly ever gets angry, and it’s scary because what if he’s really done it now? When he told Tilda at school that he and Fel were adopted, she said adopted meant that your parents loved you less. She said adopted kids got bounced around from house to house whenever their parents got sick of them, and what if Papa’s going to get sick of Darevas now?

“I’m sorry,” he says, again.

Papa sighs, and picks him up, and pulls him into his lap.

“What are you sorry for?” he asks, quietly, as he brushes Darevas’ hair away from his cheeks.

“I’m sorry for taking the candy,” he says.

Papa waits, a moment.

“Is that all?” he wonders.

Darevas swallows.

“And ‘m sorry for lying,” he says.

Papa leans down, and kisses the top of his head.

“You should be,” he tells him. “Felasel loves you. When you purposefully try and get him into trouble, so that you will not be… you betray him. You hurt him. He is your brother, not your tool.”

Darevas swallows, and a fresh wave of misery washes over him, and he sobs again. He hadn’t thought of it like that. He’d never get Felasel into  _real_ trouble. Trouble with parents is different. It’s not  _dangerous._  Mama and Papa don’t hurt them. It’s just… deserts, and cartoons, and things like that. He didn’t think he was being a traitor.

“Am… am I… a b-bad, a bad brother?” he asks, in between sobbing breaths. Is he like Uncle Falon’Din? Mama told him Uncle Falon’Din was a bad brother. That’s why him and Felasel can’t be alone with him.

“No,” his Papa says. “But you were acting like one.”

Darevas cries some more, and Papa rocks him and soothes him, and he buries his fist in his shirt and leans into him until all the fear in him has finally been cried out. Then he sighs, and lets Papa wipe his face with some tissues.

“All finished?” Papa asks.

He nods.

“Alright. Then in that case, you owe your brother an apology,” he says. “And you will be getting no desert, either, and no cartoons for a week.”

“A  _week?”_  Darevas squeaks. “That’s  _forever!”_

Papa pats his shoulder.

“In the ancient world, treachery was punishable by death. This is a much lighter alternative,” he says, and he sounds like himself again. His tone is light and one of his eyebrows is quirked, and he isn’t angry anymore.

Darevas nods, and scrubs at his cheeks.

“Okay,” he agrees, with a long, deep sigh.


End file.
